What If You Didn't Have To Wait
Have you ever noticed yourself thinking, “I’ll feel better when…”?
Many of us do this, often without realizing it.
When I get everything done on my to-do list. When things finally settle down. When I reach the goal I’ve been working toward. When I find the right relationship. When I have more clarity about what comes next.
And somewhere along the way, we attach a feeling to that outcome: Then I’ll feel settled. Then I’ll feel proud. Then I’ll feel free.
We tend to think something outside of us has to change before we can feel the way we want to feel.
But we don’t have to wait until something changes to experience the feelings we’re hoping for. Those feelings can actually help shape how we get there.
How you feel influences your perspective, the choices you make, the opportunities you recognize, and how you show up.
Think about confidence. We often imagine we’ll feel more confident once we accomplish something important or receive someone’s approval. But when we begin practicing confidence now, we may be more willing to speak up, take more initiative, or act on something we’ve been avoiding.
The feeling changes how we show up. And how we show up influences the results we create.
I know this can sound like a stretch. Feeling the way you want to feel before anything has actually changed might even feel like pretending. But this isn’t about denying what’s happening or pretending a difficult situation isn’t hard. It’s about recognizing that even in the midst of a difficult circumstance, you still have a choice in how you think, feel, and respond to it.
So here’s something I’d invite you to consider:
How are you hoping to feel when what you’re waiting for finally happens?
Maybe it’s peace, freedom, joy, or something else entirely.
Once you’ve identified it, how would you live and show up today if you were already feeling the way you want to feel?
If it’s peace, what might you stop worrying about or trying to control?
If it’s freedom, what might you give yourself permission to do?
If it’s joy, what would you make more time for or appreciate more fully today?
And if you’re not sure how to access that feeling now, think back to a time when you did feel it. Remember what it felt like for you. Bring it to mind and notice how it changes the way you approach what’s in front of you today.
The next time you notice yourself putting a feeling on the other side of an outcome, ask yourself:
What if I didn’t have to wait? How could I bring a little more of the way I want to feel into how I show up today?